November 13, 2024

The first sign something was wrong at Sofía’s house was the unlocked door when she got home from school. She was always the first one home, arriving hours before her parents returned from work.

As she walked to the kitchen, she counted the tiles on the floor, stalling while trying to prepare herself. She knew something had to be wrong.

And when she found her mother crying at the kitchen table, her heart stopped. Through choked sobs, Sofía’s mother told her that her father was killed in an accident at work. And in that moment, Sofía’s life changed forever.

Sofía’s father was a construction worker who seemed invincible. It never occurred to her that the work he did was dangerous. She always admired how strong and brave he was. He made her want to be brave, too. That’s all she could think of as she tried to comprehend her family’s new reality.

On the day of the funeral, Sofía didn’t cry. She was afraid that if she started, she might never stop. Her whole family gathered to support Sofía and her mother, but she never felt so alone.

In the weeks following the loss of her father, Sofía got so used to pushing away her feelings that she began to feel numb. But it wasn’t just sadness she couldn’t feel. There was no joy in moments that should be happy. There was no laughter. And still, Sofía would not let herself cry.

“At some point, I got the idea that I had to be strong and couldn’t let myself feel too sad about my dad,” she explained. “I guess I thought I was being brave by not crying. And the more I shut down my emotions, the harder it got.”

With her grief bottled up, Sofía’s emotions would erupt in unpredictable ways. She got in trouble more often at school when she would talk back to the teacher or pick fights with her classmates. She never got in trouble before. But now, she was always finding herself in detention or in the principal’s office.

But things really blew up when Sofía’s mom began to date again. To Sofía, this was an unimaginable betrayal to her father.

“It felt like my mom was trying to replace him,” she said. “I didn’t want a new dad. I just wanted my dad.”

Sofía’s bad behavior began to get out of control at home. She often screamed at her mother. Sometimes she would throw or break things. And some days, she wouldn’t speak to her mom at all. Her anger felt righteous. She saw no reason to try to fix things with her mom.

But when Sofía ended up in the principal’s office for the third time in a week, her principal made it clear that her behavior would no longer be tolerated. She called Sofía’s mother for a meeting at the school. And when her mom told the principal about Sofía’s behavior at home, they both agreed that Sofía needed more help than either of them could give. That’s when her principal brought up Mercy Home.

Sofía resisted the idea at first. She screamed cruel things at her mother. But eventually she realized it might be her only opportunity to turn things around.

“I got scared when the principal said I could get expelled from school,” Sofía admitted. “It felt like everyone was giving up on me. But I knew I couldn’t give up on myself.”

The first weeks at Mercy Home were difficult for Sofía. Even though things were bad with her mom, she missed her and her home greatly. Sometimes she would think back to when she lived with both her parents, part of a happy family. It felt so unfair that it was taken away from her. It was only when she began opening up in therapy that she was able to deal with these emotions.

In her weekly meetings with her therapist, Sofía began to unpack her grief, her anger, and why she felt it was so important not to show how sad she was. Just talking about her feelings helped. And Sofía’s mom regularly attended family therapy with Sofía.

“My mom and I were able to talk about a lot of the things we wouldn’t talk about when my dad first died,” Sofía said. “I never even told my mom about how sad I was. I think she was surprised how much I was struggling.”

Of course, their relationship won’t heal overnight. Sofía is still dealing with her tremendous loss, and she knows it might always be difficult for her. But thanks to Mercy Home, she also knows that she will have the support and tools to deal with it.

“I have learned so much about how to express myself,” she said. “Before, I would keep things to myself and just felt angry all the time. Mercy Home has taught me better ways to deal with it.”

Sofía’s school agreed to work with her now that she was at Mercy Home. Sofía learned strategies to deal with her frustration at school instead of acting out. So far, her teachers have noticed her progress and have complimented the improvements she is making. Sofía knows that education is important to having the future she wants, so she’s working hard to get good grades and stay out of trouble.

“I think I want to be a teacher someday,” Sofía said. “But I know I have to keep working hard to get there. And Mercy Home will help me!”

Before coming to our Home, Sofía was on path to destruction. But now, things feel much smoother. And she finally has hope for the future.

“It seemed like things would never get better,” she said. “But now I can finally see the possibilities ahead of me.”

Please note: Because we care deeply about protecting our children’s privacy, the names and certain identifying details in this story have been changed.